DCS: doodles weaver

cabbage by a head

Winstead Sheffield Glenndenning Dixon Weaver loved to pull pranks and plan practical jokes as a student at Stanford University. His penchant for comedy led him to become a contributor to the school’s humor magazine.

Using his childhood nickname “Doodles”, he began appearing on Rudy Vallee’s radio program and eventually signed on as a member of the raucous big-band Spike Jones and His City Slickers in 1946. While performing with the zany Jones, Doodles created the character of Professor Feetlebaum, a crazy scholar who specialized in confusing soliloquies, mangled speech and Spoonerisms (transposing the first letters of corresponding words). He is most famous and best remembered for his horse race announcing bit during Jones’ inspired take on “The William Tell Overture.” Doodles toured with Jones and his band until the 1950s.

Based on a hilarious Ajax cleanser commercial he did with a pig, Doodles was given his own TV show as a summer replacement for the popular Your Show of Shows  on NBC. He was a frequent guest on variety shows and sitcoms, including The Andy Griffith Show,  Dragnet, The Donna Reed Show — even The Monkees  and Batman.  Doodles also had supporting roles in nearly 100 films, appearing several times alongside Jerry Lewis and a cameo in Hitchcock‘s ornithological chiller The Birds.  In addition, Doodles served as the host of several low-budget childrens’ shows, with the credits listing “Doodles… Doodles Weaver” and “Everybody Else… Doodles Weaver.”

He also was a contributor to the early days of Mad  magazine.

Doodles battled with alcohol addiction later in his life, as well as failing health. He underwent a triple-bypass heart operation in the late 70s. In an interview in 1981, he said “Nothing means anything when you’re in pain.”

In 1983, 71-year old Doodles died from a self-inflicted gunshot.

His niece, actress Sigourney Weaver, carries on the family’s showbiz name.

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IF: new

This week’s Illustration Friday challenge word is “new”.
Here comes the jackpot question in advance

New Year’s Eve 1986 was the most memorable New Year’s Eve for me — and nothing spectacular even happened. It was better than the New Year’s Eve when I got stupid drunk and discovered true meaning in Side Two of Pink Floyd’s Wish You Were Here. It was better than the New Year’s Eve that I dumped Linda Cohen just forty minutes after the ball dropped in Times Square. It was better than New Year’s Eve 1999, when I still maintained that it was not the turn of the century no matter what eleventy gazillion people said. No, I will never forget New Year’s Eve 1986 and even though I actually slept right through the clock striking midnight, I still remember it fondly it all these years later.

I have loved Walt Disney World since I set foot on those magical grounds in central Florida for the first time in 1981. I took two great summer trips there with friends, followed by a honeymoon with my new bride a few years later. Although, my wife and I love the Disney theme parks and the surrounding attractions (read: outlet malls), the heat and humidity in the Orlando area in July can be uncomfortable. So, we decided to give a December trip a try. The notion of seeing the Magic Kingdom decorated for Christmas heightened our excitement.

The decision to drive the 990 miles to Mickey’s Mecca was made without a discussion. Despite the fact that Mrs. P was just informed that she was six weeks pregnant, driving our car was still our preferred choice for transportation. We knew that with a family expansion, our next trip to anywhere would be way off in the unforeseeable future. So, my wife wanted one last long-distance hurrah behind the wheel before the responsibility of parenthood forces us to think rationally. Besides, she loves driving and I love passengering, so it’s a match made in heaven — by way of Triple A.

We were joined on this trip by Ricci, Mrs. P’s longtime closest friend, who was Maid of Honor at our wedding and our choice for godmother to our pending offspring. While I made the arrangements for admission tickets and plotting a route for our journey (in the days before the internet and the GPS), Ricci offered to take on the task of booking hotel accommodations near Disney World. A few days before our departure, Ricci cheerfully reported that she had secured a hotel.

We loaded up the hatchback of our tiny Nissan with enough essential gear for three adults and we left the day after Christmas, which — as the calendar would have it — was the first night of Chanukah. My ever-prepared spouse packed a small menorah and enough candles to take us through Day Eight of the observance. Judah Maccabee would have been proud. Mrs. P navigated the car south on I-95 and we talked and sang and marveled at the quirky sights along the way (A Cracker Barrel every fifteen feet qualifies as — quirky — in my book). After a long day of driving (and an obligatory stop at South of the Border for God knows what reason!), we pulled into a roadside motel just north of Savannah, Georgia. We just wanted to stretch our legs, eat and sleep so we could arrive fresh and relaxed in Orlando the next afternoon. Plus, we needed to light candles for Chanukah’s opening night. We grabbed a quick dinner at the restaurant next to our motel, returned to our room, kindled the holiday flames and hit the sack. We woke early the next morning and headed out to the same restaurant for breakfast. After our morning meal, we came back to find our room had been made up by the attentive housekeeping staff — beds made, fresh towels stacked by the small sink, carpets vacuumed, waste cans emptied. However, the remnants of the previous evening’s Chanukah candles were conspicuously untouched. The matchbook lay in the exact same position in which it was left. The melted candle wax, now hardened, stood undisturbed — its frozen drips never reaching the nearly circular, solid puddle of paraffin below. Several unused candles were untouched, still balanced precariously upon one another, just as they had slid from the box eight hours earlier. We figured the chambermaids were horrified and mistook this display for some primitive ritual of black magic, wanting no parts of it. Perhaps they left the room extra clean as a peace offering.

After a full morning on the road, we took the Kissimmee exit on I-4 and began the search for our hotel. Since it was holiday time, the hotels along that stretch of US Route 192 were adorned in Christmas finery. Hundreds of lights twinkled from in and around artificial greenery and from under piles of fake snow, giving the otherwise temperate clime a faux-wintry façade. The changeable signage below each lodging establishment’s illuminated logo declared some sort of sentiment of the season. We passed numerous “Happy Holidays,” “Seasons Greetings,” and the occasional holiday-specific “Merry Christmas,” all glowing softly with a welcoming radiance, regardless of the succession of angry “NO VACANCY” signs ablaze just a few inches below. Luckily, we had reservations. The procession of corporate resorts dwindled and we finally located our hotel. It was the last one on the strip before the multi-lane highway yielded to overgrown brush and heat-buckled macadam. The backlit sign proclaimed “Happy Birthday Jesus” in eight-inch high, right-to-the-point Helvetica Bold Caps. This was to be our home for the next five days.

I obtained the key and directions to our room from the office. I pointed to my wife and she pulled the car ahead in the direction of my outstretched finger. I turned the key in the lock (remember — this was 1986 in a technologically-deficient hotel) and the door swung open to reveal a plain room with two plain beds, a plain lamp and plain dresser and, as we soon discovered, a sink without running water. A quick call to the office (on the age-yellowed desk phone) told me that some work was being performed on the pipes and the water should be on in “a little bit.” I was not familiar with the Southern chronological time-frame of “a little bit,” so we had no choice but to stick it out and wait. After settling in and a casual dinner, we decided to turn in and get an early start tomorrow at the Magic Kingdom. I noticed that instead of a deadbolt and chain, our hotel room door sported a length of rubber hose nailed to the door jamb adjacent to the knob. (I shit you not!) Proper security was achieved by looping the hose around the door knob, followed by praying to the Lord Birthday Boy. I followed the procedure with the hose, but instead of prayer, I opted to slide a chair in front of the door. I put my faith in a heavy object rather than a magical Lamb of God.

The next morning we were jarred awake by a sound. Not a phone ring or an alarm clock or even the sound of wrenches tightening pipes. This was a human sound; a human voice — or two. Through the paper-thin walls, we could hear the unmistakable tones of an argument, and a heated one, at that! It was coming from the adjoining room. While there was no denying that a bitter disagreement was unfolding on the other side of a few inches of plaster and wood, we couldn’t make out a single recognizable word. Actually, we could make out four words. Four distinct words.  Four words that were used repeatedly and they came through clear as crystal as though the speaker were at a lecture hall podium. “SHUT THE FUCK UP!” burst forth in staccato rhythm.  Then, some muffled dialogue. Then, some more muffled dialogue, until the fervent crescendo of “shut the fuck up! Shut The Fuck Up! SHUT THE FUCK UP!” pierced the suppressed fracas again, cutting like a machete through softened butter. We were glued to the unseen action, momentarily stopping our preparations for rushing out to a theme park. Suddenly, the explicit (but subdued) sound of a slamming door signified the ruckus had ended. We laughed as we resumed getting ready to start our day. Making our way across the parking lot to our car, we wondered about the “SHUT THE FUCK UP!” family, surmising that if they were here, then they are on vacation and if they are on vacation, then — Dear Lord! — how did they behave at home?

It was odd being in Walt Disney World wrapped in a heavy jacket for warmth, especially after so many previous visits in shorts and T-shirts. Disney World draws tourists from so many areas and so many various climates, the mish-mash of clothing we saw was intriguing. While in a queue line for It’s a Small World, we were flanked by a family in parkas (from Florida) and a family in Hawaiian shirts and clam diggers (from Minnesota). The weather was indeed brisk. While waiting for the next performance of The Country Bear Jamboree (re-programmed for the season as The Country Bears’ Christmas Vacation), the three of us chatted and planned out our day. In front of us was a harried mother with a baby in the crook of her arm. A small boy, about 6-years old, ran around her like a blur, screaming, flailing his arms, swinging on the ropes that delineated the queue area. The poor woman was exasperated, trying unsuccessfully to keep the child in check. In front of them were an older couple dressed in Christmas-y sweaters and knit gloves and a single woman roughly the same age. They were quietly talking, perhaps about finally being able to do all the things they hoped to, now that they had reached retirement age. As she talked, the single woman kept craning her neck over the crowds, obviously gauging the arrival of the missing member of their foursome. Soon, a smiling white-haired man, all sweatered and gloved and looking like a missing piece to this retired crew puzzle, approached. He held before him a cardboard tray with four neatly-arranged foam cups, wispy curls of steam escaping from their vented plastic lids. Balancing the tray, he slipped under the ropes, joined his party and began distributing the beverages. Suddenly, the gyrating 6-year old flung himself forward, his outstretched arms knocking the man off-balance for a second. He regained his footing without spilling a drop, but was noticeably shaken by the unexpected shove. The boy’s mother, now mortified, grabbed the youngster’s arm with enough force to yank it from its socket and, with baby parked on her hip, pulled him out of line for a overdue lesson in “How to Behave in Public,” complete with some hands-on reinforcement.  The two couples looked bewildered, as though they had entered a play in the middle of the second act. With pleading eyes, they silently sought an explanation from us, since we were close enough to bear witness. “Well,” I offered, “maybe he was mad that you didn’t bring hot cocoa for him.”

To celebrate New Year’’s Eve, Walt Disney World had a veritable smorgasbord of festive events lined up. There would be fireworks and parades and marching bands and a giant mess to clean up the next day and, of course, thousands of people. We crammed as many rides as we could into that afternoon. Our plan was to leave the park, get a fast dinner, grab a nap and come back refreshed and ready for a long night of partying. I followed the “leaving the park” and the “fast dinner” part as per our arrangement, but when it came time for the “nap” portion, I got a little tripped up. Actually, I never woke up. Come to think of it, I don’t think I ate dinner. Mrs. P and Ricci did, or so they told  me when they came back to our hotel room after midnight to find me fully-clothed and zonked out cross-ways on the bed. The television was blaring with the harrowing story of a deadly casino fire in Puerto Rico and I still slept through the shouting reporters and the wail of sirens. Even the exploding fireworks (that I was missing) from the nearby Disney Resort weren’t enough to stir my slumber.

I missed welcoming the New Year for the first time in ages. So, why was New Year’s Eve 1986 so memorable? It was the gateway to 1987; the year life changed for Mr. and Mrs. Pincus. In eight months, we welcomed something much better than a new year.

We welcomed a son.

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DCS: walter scott

Tough luck for the cheater
In 1966, Bob Kuban and The In-Men had a Billboard Top 40 hit with “The Cheater,” a catchy pop tune that gave a word of warning to potential adulterers. The In-Men, an eight-piece band with a horn section, were a throwback for the time. Competition from guitar-driven bands of the British Invasion was tough to overcome. Bob Kuban and The In-Men never had another song rise above #70 on the charts. They remained popular in their native St. Louis, but national fame eluded them. Lead singer Walter Scott attempted a solo career, but was unsuccessful. He returned to St. Louis and formed a cover band, singing other bands hits throughout the 70s.

Early in 1983, Walter Scott and Bob Kuban sang together on a television special and made plans for an all-out reunion tour to celebrate the twentieth anniversary of The In-Men. That reunion never happened.

Walter Scott disappeared on December 27, 1983.

In April 1987, Walter’s body was found, hog-tied, floating face down in a cistern on property owned by James H. Williams. He had been shot in the back. Williams, who was Walter’s wife’s secret lover was arrested and convicted of Walter’s murder. He was also convicted of the murder of his first wife, Sharon Williams. JoAnn Scott, Walter’s wife, was named an accessory and was sentenced to five years for hindering the prosecution. Williams, who received a life sentence, died in prison in 2011.

“The Cheater,” and its ironic lyrics,  is part of the permanent “one-hit wonders” display at the Rock and Roll Hall of Fame.

Listen to it here.

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IF: glow

you would even say it glows
“We are all worms, but I do believe that I am a glow worm.”
— Winston Churchill

When Sir Winston Churchill passed away in 1965, his funeral was the largest state funeral in world history, with representatives from 112 nations.

Only China did not send an emissary.

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from my sketchbook: earl carroll

My real name is Mister Earl

Vocalist Earl Carroll and some of his Harlem friends formed The Carnations in 1953. Two members left after the group’s first recording. They were replaced and the new group renamed themselves The Cadillacs for its association with automotive elegance and to separate the group from multitude of “bird” and “flower”-named competing bands. With Earl still handling the lead vocal duties, The Cadillacs scored a hit in 1955 with “Speedo,” a catchy tune based around Earl’s nickname.

After the success of “Speedo,” the band experienced creative differences and split. J. R. Bailey and Lavern Drake formed The Four Cadillacs, while Earl recruited additional members to become Earl Carroll and The Cadillacs. Surprisingly, both groups enjoyed success.

In 1961, Earl left The Cadillacs and joined rival group The Coasters. He was the tenor vocalist for The Coasters on hits like “Love Potion #9” and “Cool Jerk. ” Earl remained with the group for nearly 30 years, until he reformed The Cadillacs in 1990.

Sometime in 1990, a newspaper reported that Earl was employed as the school custodian at elementary school PS 87 on West 78th Street adjacent to Central Park. The young student body was not familiar with Earl’s musical background, although they referred to their beloved custodian as “Speedo.” In 2003, Earl was chosen to be the subject of That’s Our Custodian, in of a series of children’s books highlighting various members of elementary school staff. Publicity following publication of the book enabled Earl to reignite his career. He became a staple in doo-wop revival shows frequently broadcast of public television. He continued to perform until his death from a stroke in November 2012. Earl was 75.

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DCS: star stowe

catch a falling star and put it in your pocket, never let it fade away

Just out of her teens, Ellen Stowe left her hometown of Little Rock, Arkansas and headed to Los Angeles — her eyes set on becoming a professional dancer. She began dancing is different strip clubs until a scout from Playboy  spotted her. He offered the petite blond a chance at some test shots for the magazine. Ellen — now calling herself “Star” for her love of the twinkling nighttime sky — was accepted and became the Playboy‘s February 1977 Playmate of the Month.

Her new-found fame catapulted her into the world of Hollywood celebrities. Star was rubbing elbows with actors and rock stars, including a special relationship with KISS bassist Gene Simmons. Star and Gene saw a lot of each other and Star accompanied the band on promo tours and posed regularly for publicity pictures. However, the relationship fizzled along with Star’s dancing career.

She married but divorced soon after she gave birth to a son. Desperate to reignite her career, she traveled to Fort Lauderdale, dropping her child off at her mother’s house in Little Rock on the way. Using her connection to Playboy as a “claim to fame,” she found employment at various strip clubs in the Florida resort town. Star began keeping company with some club patrons. Her off-work hours were filled with parties and drugs — a lot of drugs. She turned to prostitution to get the money she needed to fund her increasing narcotics habit.

On March 16, 1997,  Star’s body was found behind a neighborhood pharmacy. She had been strangled to death. A few weeks earlier, the body of another prostitute was discovered in the same place. Police felt it was the work of a serial killer, but all leads went nowhere.

In three days, Star would have turned 40 years old.

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IF: snow

Oh, the weather outside is frightful!
My dad and snow had a horrible relationship. My dad hated snow and, sometimes, it seemed as though snow hated him right back.

My father was a guy who was pretty much set in his ways. He woke up the same time everyday. He struggled his way out of bed and braced his bent frame on the edge of his bureau. A hacking cough rattled through his lungs as he instinctively reached for his first cigarette of the day — the first of many. He’d dress in the same ritual order — shirt (summer: white; short-sleeved. winter: heavy flannel), socks, shoes and then he’d wrestle his work pants over his already shoe-clad feet.

He’d shuffle to the kitchen and pour a heaping portion of Kellogg’s Corn Flakes into a bowl. Then, with a light sprinkle of sugar, a splash of milk and another cigarette, he’d polish off that cereal in a matter of seconds, a trait he picked up in the US Navy. A trait he never shook. After his hurried breakfast, he’d thread his arms through the sleeves of his coat, light another cigarette and head out to work. My father was a meat cutter and over a period of 50 years, he plied his trade at many locations, but his duties always remained the same. My dad was a creature of habit. Everything always remained the same.

When my father arrived home after work, he’d eat dinner (it had better be ready!), separating each course with a cigarette. Then, he’d plop himself down in his favorite chair (off-limits to anyone else’s ass) and watch television, raging through a pack or so of cigarettes until the eleven o’clock news broadcast. For nine months out of the year, the news was just the final part of the day before my dad hit the sack and started the whole procedure again. But in the winter months, watching the weather segment of the news was a tense, nail-biting adventure in stress. Especially when the forecast included the threat of snow.

Snow was the monkey wrench. The fly in the ointment. The thorn in my dad’s side.

A typical December weather report would throw my father into a rabid frenzy. The smiling TV weatherman would joyfully point to cold fronts stretching across the northeastern portion of the map and indicate the possibility of some winter precipitation and accumulation.  My father would frown and spew one obscenity after another at this bastard who was deliberately conjuring a blizzard to fuck up my father’s daily routine.

“Sure!,” he’d holler at the television, “Joke about it, you son-of-a-bitch-bastard! Joke about the goddamn snow! It’s a goddamn joke to you!” And then my father’s wintertime ritual would begin. He’d stand in our darkened living room with the door opened, but still shielded from the elements by an aluminum storm door. With a cigarette smoldering between the butcher knife-gnarled fingers of his hand, he stare up at the sky, using a nearby streetlight as a gauge for the pending snow storm. And he’d curse.

Soon the first few flakes of snow fluttered through that shaft of light and the cursing increased. “Shit. Shit. Shit. Shit. Shit.,” he muttered rapid-fire like a tommy gun. He puffed angrily as the falling crystals formed a thin blanket across our lawn and our neighbor’s lawns. Soon, the black surface of the street disappeared under a soft layer of snow and my father’s mind frantically filled with emergency plans. Immediately, he grabbed a small overnight bag and began stuffing it with a few days worth of clothing. He informed my mother that, in case it got “really bad,” he’d have to book a hotel room, despite the fact that we lived a mere twenty minute drive from the supermarket that was his employ and we lived in the fifth largest city in the country, not a remote country shire miles from civilization. Philadelphia has dealt with snow for years and, although it is subjected to much criticism, the Streets Department have always done a pretty good job. But, as far as my dad was concerned, we lived in Nome, Alaska.

So, there was my dad. At the door. Staring out the window and cursing the snow until he finally relinquished his post and went to bed.

The next morning, he dressed as he did the day before except for boots instead of shoes, but still putting them on before his pants. Skipping breakfast, but not a cigarette, he pulled on his gloves and began cleaning off his car with the nearly-bare brush he kept in the trunk next to a smashed box of dirty Kleenex. Then, my dad positioned himself behind the steering wheel and drove to work, his hands sporting white-knuckles, the speedometer never teetering above 25. The driving was, as he always said, “treacherous.”

I seem to have inherited my dad’s dislike of winter weather, in spite of taking the train to work for the past five years. Realistically, snow isn’t a problem for me, since they never let me operate the train. But, I still don’t like snow. My son is not fond of snow either. And he doesn’t even drive.

Maybe it’s a Pincus thing.

 

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from my sketchbook: dick stuart

Whoops!
All-Star first baseman Dick Stuart hit 228 home runs in his 12-year career. Although he never was a league leader for homers, he finished in the top ten for five years. His career batting average was .264. Dick was  in the on-deck circle when teammate Bill Mazeroski hit the ninth inning home run to win the 1960 Series for the Pirates.

His fielding, however, was another story. As good a hitter as he was, Dick was horrendous in the field. In 1963, he committed 29 errors, a record that still stands among first basemen. His subpar performance at first earned poor Dick the unflattering nickname “Dr. Strangeglove.” His reputation was so bad that, it was noted that once during a game, a hot dog wrapper was blowing across the diamond and when Dick picked it up, he received a standing ovation from the crowd. Relating the story, a writer commented, ” It was the first thing he had managed to pick up all day, and the fans realized it could very well be the last.”

Dick is best known for playing with Pittsburgh, but he bounced around both leagues with short stints on six other teams, including two years in Japan.

Dick passed away in 2002 at the age of 70.

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DCS: jean spangler

Hey you/Threw it all away/By holding everything in/Hey Jean don't rock the boat/When you can't swim

Jean Spangler danced in Beryl Wallace‘s shadow at Earl Carroll’s nightclub on Sunset Boulevard. She had dreams and aspirations, though. She had a few uncredited roles in some big Hollywood pictures – Miracles of the Bells, When My Baby Smiles at Me, Young Man with a Horn. She had just completed a small part in The Petty Girl with Bob Cummings, hoping it would lead to the break she so desperately wanted and needed.

Newly-divorced at 26 and trying to make ends meet, Jean and her five-year-old daughter lived with Jean’s mother, brother and sister-in-law. Jean mingled with people she felt could advance her career – actors, studio heads and even gangsters. She dated Davy Ogul, one of notorious mobster Mickey Cohen’s goons. (Mickey was instrumental in helping Bugsy Siegel set up The Flamingo Hotel in Las Vegas.) At 8 pm on October 7, 1949, Jean Spangler kissed her little girl on the forehead and told her sister-in-law she was meeting her ex-husband to discuss delinquent child support payments. Afterwards, she explained, she was to be included in some late-night scenes to be shot at a movie studio. Jean waved ‘goodbye’, walked out the door and was never seen again.

The next morning, a worried Sophie Spangler, Jean’s sister-in-law, filed a missing person report at the local police station. A police investigation led to newly-remarried Dexter Benner, Jean’s ex. Dexter told authorities that he hadn’t seen Jean for weeks and his new wife confirmed that he had not left the house the previous evening. A check of the movie studios showed that no filming was scheduled anywhere for the night before.

Two days later, Jean’s purse was discovered at the entrance to Griffith Park in the Hollywood Hills. The straps of the purse were torn free on one side, as though they had been ripped from the owner’s arm. Although the purse contained no money, there was an unfinished note, in Jean’s handwriting, that read:

“Kirk, Can’t wait any longer, Going to see Dr. Scott. It will work best this way while mother is away, ”   (The note ended abruptly with a comma.)

A search team of sixty police officers and a hundred volunteers scoured the 4,000-acre park and came up empty. No more clues were found. Police began investigating pieces from the note. They contacted actor Kirk Douglas, who starred in Young Man with a Horn, in which Jean was an on-screen extra. Kirk, interviewed while vacationing in Palm Springs, said that, despite her appearance in his latest film, he did not know her.

A friend had mentioned that Jean was several months pregnant at the time of her disappearance and sought an abortion (illegal at the time). Perhaps “Dr. Scott” was a contact for the illicit procedure, but pursuit of “Dr. Scott” led nowhere. Davy Ogul, coincidentally, disappeared on October 9 and was reported by several witnesses to have been spotted in El Paso, Texas. When questioned, a hotel clerk claimed that he saw Davy Ogul and a woman fitting Jean’s description sharing accommodations in the Texas town. Futher investigation yielded another dead end.

Jean Spangler’s whereabouts have been unknown for 62 years.

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happy holidays 2012 from JPiC

It's beginning to look a lot like something.
CLICK HERE for a larger version.

My annual Christmas music compilation is available as a FREE DOWNLOAD for a limited time.
24 unusual holiday songs and a custom full-color cover with track listings — all for you and all for FREE!

Just CLICK HERE for “A Non-Traditional Christmas 2012.”
You will be taken to a new window. Just click the word “download” next to the title and you’re on your way to holiday music nirvana (although there is no actual Nirvana included on this year’s compilation.)

(Please contact me if you have trouble with the download.)

*********

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