US presidents. What a bunch of fuckers. Literally. A larger collective of men who can’t keep it in their pants never existed. Take a look at this list:
- Declaration of Independence author and third President Thomas Jefferson fathered six children with Sally Hemmings. a slave he inherited from his wife.
- When beloved 32nd President FDR died in a woman’s arms, it was the arms of his longtime mistress Lucy Mercer, not ol’ Eleanor.
- 36th President, the genial Texan Lyndon Johnson carried on an affair with Madeleine Brown for 21 years while Lady Bird turned a blind eye.
- Despite being married to a timeless beauty, 35th President JFK slept with every woman who looked at him cockeyed (no pun intended).
- Bill Clinton, our 42nd President… well, he loved a lot more than just French fries and barbecue.
By looks alone, the most unlikely adulterer was 29th President Warren G. Harding. Historians rank Harding’s presidency as one of the worst in the country’s history. Scandals and corruption abounded in his administration, including his mishandling of the Great Railroad Workers Strike of 1922 and the notorious Teapot Dome Scandal that was tagged the most “sensational scandal in the history of American politics” until Watergate. A member of his cabinet and several of his appointees were convicted, and sent to prison for bribery and defrauding the federal government. But, none of this mattered to amourous President Harding, ’cause he was fighting the women off with a stick.
In 1912, sixteen year-old Nan Britton became infatuated with 47 year-old, married Warren Harding. Young Nan plastered the walls of her room with newspaper clippings and photos of the former Ohio Lieutenant Governor. Harding, a friend of Nan’s father, spoke with the girl, telling her that she would one day meet the man of her dreams. Harding, meanwhile was in the throes of a passionate tryst with Carrie Phillips, wife of James Phillips, owner of a prominent Ohio department store. As Harding’s bid for the US Presidency gathered steam, Carrie was given a new Cadillac, $20,000 and trip around the world to keep her mouth shut.
In June 1923, Harding set out on a cross-country “Voyage of Understanding” pubilicity tour to reconnect with the people. By the time he reached San Francisco in August, he was suffering from exhaustion and pneumonia. During a conversation with his wife at the Palace Hotel, Harding suddenly shuddered and died. In 1927, Nan Britton published what is considered to be the first “kiss-and-tell” book. She attested that, on numerous occasions, she and Harding had sex in a White House closet and that he was the father of her daughter Elizabeth. She also claimed the President’s life was a series of “cheap sex episodes”.
When Carrie Phillips passed away in 1960, over 100 letters from Harding were discovered among her personal effects. Most were flowery love letters, but a number of them were very erotic in nature.
Stuff you’d never expect from a guy that looked like this…
Yep, presidents are dogs, but Jimmy Carter got in trouble for saying he had “lusted in his heart”? Nice illo. Like their attitude 🙂
Your pun made me reflect on whether Marilyn Monroe had a weird eye. It took me a minute. I see what you did there.
Yep…a real looker that Harding was. Must be the mystical magical power that these scumbags have over their women. And this is why more women should be elected!!